Helen, Bridge, and Manda.

A normal rambling post ahead. ^_^

Helen the baby fox: YES I WATCHED HELEN!! Okay, yes I'm a bit slow... But hey, that ain't a crime. =P I'm currently hopelessly in love with the movie. Just as I was crazy over Final Fantasy Advent Children. ...Okay, perhaps not. But either way, it's a really touching movie... Some parts really made me think... And the way Helen was hopping around and stuff... It was really cute ^_^ Poor Clar had to deal with my (occasional?) gushing. The little fella just makes your heart melt.

Going out: Went out with manda yesterday after her last paper... And I've seriously not enjoyed myself like that for some time =D I saw Charmaine, Elvin (from 1st 3 months) and got to hang out a little with manda~ =D=D It was really really wonderful. Felt like _my_ exams were over too. Which of course, isn't true. What with the deadlines so near... But ah well ^^;

Looking forward to tomorrow's yukata-making... Although err... I'm just afraid I won't be able to complete it...... >_<

Talking: Okay, err, I was made to talk a little in front of a crowd a couple of days back. Don't know if I can ever get used to it. I blanked out again, went on auto-pilot, couldn't see anything, and I was probably grinning like an idiot to boot. ^^;;

BRIDGE: OMG OMG OMG OMG I LOVE BRIDGE!! Okay, err... *coughs* Alright, some probably knew how to play it since last year (those JC peeps)- (I wanted to learn it during my 1st 3 months but didn't manage to >_<) But yeah, I only just learnt it a couple weeks back from some friends from the Miyazaki Trip. Heheh... One went through JC before (and surprisingly, the same as my 1st 3 mths JC) and another I think, learnt through _his_ 1st 3 months.

But I digress. Anywayz, Bridge is really such a fun card game ;) Heheh... Sad thing is that you usually need 4 people to play... I'm hoping we get to play lots during our trip ;) And also perhaps later at practice..?

It's been a long time: Gosh, this feels comfortingly familiar... I haven't rambled like this in ages... Heheh.. And yes, talking about practice... I really should make a move... Am late >_< Signing out!


Signing off... ...
let's go!

Working hard, and enjoying it. Partly ^^

Impossible people: Heh, came across this article in WikiHow on how to deal with impossible people... Thought it might help some, and myself, sometime along the way... I like the last part. ^^ Do unto others what you would others do unto you. I've been letting other emotions get in the way of that recently. Terrible.

"Be a "possible" person. Human behavior is changed through positive modeling. An ancient saying goes, "As ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them." Live as an example of tolerance, patience, kindness and love. We are all influenced by the people in our environment. You must give in kind in order to receive in kind. Give respect, receive respect. Give understanding, get understanding. Even if the other person fails to properly reciprocate, this will eventually apply to most of the people you meet in life. "

If you're interested in seeing the article, its here: http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-Impossible-People


Untactful: Okay... Err, I've been rather untactful recently for some reason... so erm... if you've been at the recieving end of that and I've pissed/irritated you... I'm really really sorry... I've been doing that, and apologising for it, quite a bit recently. That's not a good sign.

Assignments: Hm. I've gotta complete a couple of assignments/start on some by next Mon/Tues... I've gotten into the mood for doing my Flash assignment, but my design is still really horrible... >_< I'm hoping it turns out looking ok ^^;; The good thing is that it's fun. =D Almost all my modules are this semester =^^= Thank goodness.

MSTs: That stands for 'Mid-Semester Tests' in case you didn't know ^^ Hmm... Okay... Gotten 2 back, out of 4... and those 2 were alright... Not that bad >_< GOTTA WORK HARD!! And that goes for you guys too ya! ^^ Heh. Except for those whose As are over... then... Hm. ^^;; To those who've finished their As, congrats and play hard till the university school term starts or you start your part-time work- ^_^


Signing off... ...
Picking up

Terrible, terrible road... with a Miya break.

Sharp edges: I used to be able to talk to people without hurting them... The edges were always round and I knew how to bounce. Up, down... Up. But things change. My edges have gotten a bit worn out and the the sides are getting a bit rocky, all round. Bouncing is a little tougher than before, and the height is no longer as high as it once was.

But I guess that's what they mean when we lose our spirit..? I suppose we've all had times like this before... where a bit of sandpaper-ing should get it back in shape- I just hope that this is not permanent... Or that there won't be enough material for me to sandpaper anymore.

But as long as I've got my pillars it shouldn't be a problem. ^_^ I just wonder if I have the time to sandpaper it before it breaks next time it hits.

Temper, temper: Terrible, too, man. Perhaps I _do_ need to go for an anger management course... I have my way of dealing with my own temper and stress and hurt... But when it's not enough... When it's not accepted... Perhaps I'll need to find another way..? (Yes, 'manda, I can practically hear your response at the back of my head now >_<)

MSTs: OMG MSTS ARE IN... ONE+ DAY!!! CRAP!! Oh gawd, I don't think I can do this... When other stress just pile up on me I CANNOT STUDY. Crap. Like why on earth am I even here blogging man!!! Please, do me a favour, SLAP me if you see me online... I just need to get the momentum... ='( I'm gonna break... Any second. Any further I'm gonna throw my laptop and my handphone and myself out the window. Okay, maybe not myself... But I'll find some other way...

Clar: Let my mind argue it out, k..? I'll be fine... Thanks for worrying, though... :-)

Miya trip: Gosh, I am _so_ looking forward to it... It'll be a break from everything..... Every single little thing... Leaving, temporarily, my troubles behind, while I immerse myself in a momentary fantasy... Away from all sorts of pressure against my person, and a rare, once in a dunno how long chance to find myself... I'm just gonna go out there and be myself and enjoy! IM GOING ALL OUT MAN!! =D

Background music: It's still there!! I stopped the autostart thing cause I thought it would get rather irritating and I already got one victim, so... ^^;; Sorry...!! Just wanted you guys to hear it first- ^^;

But, err... if you haven't heard it yet please do...! >_< See that little rectangular thingy on the left..? Click play k? ^^ And if you manage to catch the part I couldn't tell me please! =D Thanks in advance!!

I love the song, period.


Signing off... ...
STUDY!!!

Thank you, best friends :)

Okay... I'm gonna do another reminiscing and thank-you post again... Been going into these kinda moods a lot recently... ^^;; If I sound gay... ... *coughs* I'm afraid you'll have to bear with me, or of course, skip this post, or the first section-

Past recollection: I suddenly remembered what my best friends used to say... "Don't be too soft-hearted! That's why everyone takes advantage of you!", (Well, there was also the "Hey only I can do that! Don't let other people do that to you! I'll go talk to her."), "You should stand up for yourself!", "That person's such an ass. If if was me...", "WHAT you did that?? I want to shake you girl- How could you let him/her control you like that?", "If that person bullies you, I'll go after him/her with a chopper(or some other weapon)!", "WHAT you said sorry??! What for?? He/She should be the one apologising!" ... And of course, the one that melted me... "It hurts me to see you in this kind of situation."

=^^= *sighs dreamily* Heehee... One should see this... And recognise which ones she said- And yeah... perhaps another good friend who's said some of these before... But thank you so much-- It's times when I hear that that I know that I'm not alone and I can keep going on- Don't know what I'd do without you guys... ^_^ Perhaps it's my flaw, perhaps it's my strength... I don't know... But it's nice knowing that what I do is recognised by my friends, even if not by the person I'm doing it for.

SC days were sweet... The girls were sweet... Still are ;) And yes, that's any SC girl that's reading this right now. ^^ Love you guys.

Quote: "The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits." Oh, so true. Same goes for maturity and immaturity. Maturity comes with the ability to look out for other people other than yourself, and knowing the fact that the world doesn't revolve around you. I shall quote a friend: "You shouldn't revolve around a relationship. The relationship should revolve around everything else." So true... Guess that's how relationships stay strong and beautiful. =^^= And of course, respecting the person as a person. (I'm not sure if that actually makes sense to you, but it does, to me. I have no idea how to re-phrase it) Glad I have the person who told me that- =D Survival of the fittest, with a slightly warped meaning-


Signing off... ...
Friends are the most beautiful things one could have.

Too Close

Too Close

Nobody knows me
I've always wanted it that way
No one controls me
They never get me on the time of day

No one has seen me cry
I only do that alone
My seamless mask of disguise

Watch how I run
Far from the one
Whos getting

Too Close
Might just meet my expectations
Don't get too close
Afraid you'll see my desperation
Your revelations
Too close

I had a lover
He came and took my mask away
No suit of armour
That he could nothing into penetrate (??)

Plucked my heart with his knife
Butterfly-ed into...
Left myself open wide

Completely misused and
Falsely accused of getting

Too Close
Thought I met his expectations
But I got too close
Saw into his desperation
My revelation
Too close


Too Close
Might just meet my expectations
If you get too close
Afraid you'll see my desperation
Your revelations
Too close

Too Close

Nobody knows me

No one controls me~

====================================
Too Close: Beautiful song... Fell with it the first time I heard it... Love it to the core... Probably cause I can connect with it so well... Or is it just me...? Hmm... But the funny thing is that I can't find anything about it on the net... *growls* So I typed the lyrics out... But see that '(??)' there...? That's the part that I can't make sense out of >_< If anyone can figure it out tell me k..? It's the song playing in the background ^^

Japanese and Dance: Let's see... My dance chapter is over... Japanese may just be, too... They were both really beautiful aspects of my life... Japanese, having taken it for like, what, 6 years...? I'll miss my sensei and classmates and stuff... Dance is over, for now, too...

More time: I assumed that that would mean more time for my projects and work and stuff, but I supposed I just proved myself wrong the past week... I suppose I'll have to enforce the discipline that I so lack. No communication whatsoever while doing work. No distractions.

Handphone: I have had the insane urge to throw my handphone away quite a couple of times already... Had to borrow my classmate's eraser this morning to throw around the room in order to quench my thirst for the sound and feel of shattering... well. Objects. The table would have worked too but... *shrugs*

I wonder... If I smashed my handphone... (Karen was amazingly kind to offer her handphone for me to smash ^^;;) what would happen..? I'd be back to how I was in the past I think- Back in time- Which wouldn't be a bad thing. I could choose. If anyone wanted to get me, they could get me at home. And if I didn't want to listen, my parents could help me reject the call. I had a choice, then.

Now, I don't.

Lazy creatures: Karen said before, that technology was making us all lazy... I agree wholeheartedly. I miss the times when I could run freely everywhere, anytime, anywhere... Sprint around school... Walk from home to any place in orchard, and back again. Play basketball, badminton, etc... Although I sucked at it. Walk under the setting sun, in the evening, taking in the cool air, just thinking, just appreciating and reflecting...

When I could take the time in the bus to sleep, to go anywhere without getting tagged. Taking the stairs instead of the lift... Doing my work without having to worry about a window popping up and demanding a reply... Writing my letters and sending it to my penpals... Writing letters to my friends...

That was the life.

Love Rhombus: Truth. Beauty. Freedom. Love. Half-truth. The 4 sides and inner angle... The love rhombus' names have never struck me as hard as this before... All the essentials of life... The first 4 always so difficult to maintain... Always under pressure... Always threatening to break...

Pressure from outside is so much easier to handle than pressure from inside- I'm glad to say that most of the people close to me... Friends, family, are usually on the same line as me... So there's always something to fall back on... But I've had quite a bit of the taste of inner pressure and it really is a million times harder than outside pressure due to the inability to push back...

Quotes: I've heard a few lines that I've found amazingly accurate... "It's okay to run sometimes when heading it face on will not bring about any difference to anyone and will only result in pain, and more pain, to yourself.", "Sometimes, it's not the matter of time management... Sometimes there are just too many things that not even the master of time manipulation will be able to organise them." I've never known how true these can actually be till recently... Guess we'll only be able to keep fighting back-


Signing off... ...
The music,
Paused.