Monday 26 June 2006

Distraction galore

Okay, I wasn't supposed to blog, I really wasn't. Much less about this nonsensical... Nonsense. But the urge just came on... so...

Good mood?: Came across a lot of stupid people today that would have gotten me kinda irritated usually... but I just laughed internally. Which is... WEIRD. I'm feeling extremely disturbed about it all...

Distracted: As you can see, that's mainly the reason why I'm here blogging and not studying when I have an exam tomorrow which I've not even studied one chapter of!! I've been at the same chapter since I came back home today... I'm. So. Screwed.

Embarassment: Okay, is it possible to spontaneously combust from embarassment? =S Oddly enough, I seem to think that possible... >_<

Okay, I'm not supposed to be blogging... So I shall go back to studying.


Signing off... ...
Panicking.

Saturday 24 June 2006

KHK and brain switched off

KHK: Very, extremely entertaining~ ^^ Skye was like so nervous in the beginning!! =S I was like down (or up) there thinking to myself, "Come on Skye, you can do it. I know you can. Stop freaking out...!" Turned out alright. ^^;; I remember that happening before too. Somehow or another.

Something that would have got me on low spirits just didn't penetrate through today... That is, I met a lot of familiar faces and people I know, and I'm sure they know me too...? But none talked to me, save for Senti. And my 'imouto'. Ah well.

Brainless: Okay, I can officially say that my head has gone on holiday. -_-" And to think that the tests are just 2 days away... Gosh. Need to finish studying...

Random stuff: Yes, I know I've never posted a video... but I thought this was rather cool. Like... wow. It'd be fun running around a country like that:



I am out of time so I shall end here.


Signing off... ...
Head rest.

Friday 23 June 2006

World Cup, and reminiscing

Rambling post...

Wasted time: Okay, I was supposed to be studying and finishing my security module... And I ended up digging up past stuff and looking through them till like about 4+. Found something that was given to me in P6 during my birthday, and a letter together with it. The person made it clear that I pissed her off all the time, but she didn't not like me. The paper was falling apart. Made me think back.

They probably don't know this, but no matter how they didn't like me in the beginning, we managed to become friends after some time, and they were the ones who broke my irritating outside... The entire Anime group.... And I'm extremely grateful for that. They were, what, the first few true friends I really made in primary school. Yes, extremely pathetic, I know, having only made proper friends in P5/P6. They're one bunch I'll never forget.

Tarot cards: Okay, spent some time playing with my tarot cards this afternoon... And just now. My cards seem to be teasing me or something... Like when I asked a question, thinking that I already know the answer, but I just want to ask anyway, it gave me replies that indirectly meant "If you know it already why ask?" 3 times in a row -_-" Geez. Weird things happen when I'm supposed to be studying. This time, I've gotten back on my tarot card craze.

KHK tmr: Kouhaku (red-white song battle) tomorrow!! Yes, it'll be my first time going after like what, 4 years? =S Will be dragging someone with me and supporting Skye! This is going to be so fun.

Met Momo: Yes, gosh, missed her... Although I was only with her for slightly over an hour, it was nice. Catching up and all that. And I finally stepped into a neoprint shop again after what, a year? =D Sharing flowers with her for Skye even though she can't make it... ^^;;

Soccer craze: Apparently Momo follows some matches too- Those with the Japan team, of course. She told me about stuff and it felt so normal to be talking to her about soccer even though I don't follow it. It's probably cause she really was supporting a team. We talked about stuff and agreed on one thing: It's really sad how many Singaporeans don't actually support the teams... but follow the World Cup for betting.

I feel that strongly in school. Like everyone around me seems to be betting on the matches... And I only hear a rare few who really support a particular team. Zero-people seem to be talking about the action or about support. All I've been hearing is results, results, results, and "Stupid la, if only they made one more goal!". If my close friends say that I think I can safely infer that it was a close match between their favourite team and another, but since it's not... they mean, "Darn, I betted 3-1 and they scored 2-1." -_-" Riight. Ah well. It's extremely sad, though... So much for the World Cup.


Signing off... ...

Sunday 18 June 2006

Mirror half and talk with manda & Sugino

I look into the eyes in the mirror
Filled with fear.
Its usual cheer
Devoured by his other half.

The gaze
Burns me
And I look away

To soothe the flames
That erupted in my head.

I feel the pain,
I feel the hesitance,
I feel the hope.

Yet none of this
Is mine.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The 'poem': Just so you know, that doesn't reflect my current situation ^^;; Don't ask why I suddenly put that up, I don't know >_<

Stuff: Just had a nice talk with 'manda, and everything feels so much better now =) Screw everything. I'll take things one step at a time.

Talk with my doc: A trip to the doctor's a few days ago ended as some kind of sharing session. My world is protected now, she said. When I go out into the 'real' world, I may suffer from shock or something of the like, and when that happens, I can go look for her. Hm. Protected, yes.

I know this is utterly different from what she meant, but I think I'm really really lucky to have my current great friends and... well, stuff. It's just really sweet when I feel the protectiveness radiating off sometimes.

Fathers' Day: I think I can safely say that none of you here are fathers, but Happy Fathers' Day all the same. ^^

What?: Okay, I actually had loads to say, but everything's staying in my mind as overlapping emotions and random words that refuse to take form, so... I shall just leave this as that.



Signing off... ...
Over-blogging

Saturday 17 June 2006

Rationality and Computron

Rationality: Screw what I said a few days ago. Rationality has been thrown out the window, or ignored. -_-"

Turbo: Everything seems to have been going in turbo-mode the past few weeks... and it seems so long although it's only been such a short time. Like, too many things have happened. That is, only in certain aspects. I look at my assignments and it's different though. In that case everything seems to have zoomed by like a rocket. Everything's still untouched. I. NEED. To. Start. Concentrating.

Yes, 'manda, I know I ought to be slapped.

Computron: Yepz, second round and finals today. It was extremely fun to see the finalists battle it out. The secondary school kids were like fighting a war, the JC guys were better, and more coherent, and the tertiary people were... well. Amusing and like... Whoa. Glad to say the 'whoa' came from my buddy-classmate's group (which got first), and the SIM group. Err, amusing group was also from SP though ^^ That group went in the third round of the finals with err, 7(?) points and and came out with 0. On the dot. And there we were, worrying that they would emerge with negative points ^^;;

But even though they were amusing and cute, I still have to say that they weren't as silly as we thought, considering that they understood most of the questions that I went 'what?' at. Like, what's a binary tree with root 1? Huh?? Binary tree? All I could think of was a tree drawn with 1s and 0s. -_-" They got the answer half right, but points weren't awarded unless you get the full answer, so... Ah well.

On the contrary: The first round for the secondary school kids was like... super stupid. E.g.

What's a Desktop?
a) The display area
b) The area around the monitor

Erm, I forgot options c and d cause I think I was too busy laughing ^^;; And... Which of the following has the most space? RAM, floppy disk, CD, DVD, hard drive? Like... DUH I'm sure we've got a floppy disk in gigabytes >_<

Okay, enough rambling for today.


Signing off... ...

Friday 16 June 2006

Silent Hill and Boat Quay

Fishes: Okay, like err, I don't believe I've 'fish'ed this many times in 2 days before... Fished at least a million times yesterday because of my onslaught of gastric, and another million times today when I sent an sms to the subject of a message instead of the intended recipient. Gosh, _that_ was embarassing. -_-" Fished my entire way home after that.

Silent Hill plot: Okay, went to watch the movie, but err, the grossly pictures grossed me out. Let's just say 20 minutes into the movie I suddenly remembered why I don't watch horror movies. My asthma. Like, gosh, how can one forget about something like that??? -_-" Dumb people do that, apparently. But it didn't turn out bad. It was quite sad, but alright. Not really that shocking, like the kind that has stuff jumping out at you. This had a bit more of a dumb plot.

Fav character: Oh, and the character I liked died. -_-" Happens all the time doesn't it. Oh, thank you so much. For goodness sake, she was like, intelligent and sweet! Why do they _always_ have to kill those nice characters off? Still think that she and the main character would look really cute together, but perhaps that's just me. But she is really cool. Too good for the main character actually. She actually died for the main character!! And her famous line, though filled with a bit of vulgarity, sounded really cute coming from her =P

Main character: But the main character of the show was like ultra dumb. The dumbest person I have ever seen actually. If I could I would have thrown something at her and made sure I aimed for her head. HELLO like there's supposed to be _something_ in that skull of yours!! What did you do to it, throw it out the window before the movie started?? -_-" Gosh.

Others: Yeah, well, other stuff happened today too, but I shan't blog about those. Let's just say Boat Quay looks rather nice when the lights come on and it's a really good place to talk. And hear soccer fans screaming their lungs out.


Signing off... ...

Tuesday 13 June 2006

ECP and Fog's cleared

East Coast Park: Yepz, went to ECP to roller blade with Clarence... Like, yeah! The last time I went was with Deone, before Poly started. As usual, it took me a short while before I remembered how to blade, but it came faster than usual ^^;; 'Twas Clarence's first time blading, so we were like stumbling together in the beginning when I was still trying to remember how to blade... Then he just got better and better. ^_^ So anyway, it went like really well, and I used my cam to take lots of photos... The videos, for some reason or another, just doesn't work on my com though. -_-"

Fish and co: Ate there for the first time that day... Okay, if your jaw has just dropped, please pick it back up, I'm sure it's unbecoming. >_< Yep, ex, as I thought. But the fish was good- Guess that's why they're called 'Fish and co' ^^;; *coughs* Although I think I kept stepping on Clarence's toe =s Like, halfway through a conversation he suddenly said, "that's my toe". Gosh, and there I was happily tapping my foot against what I thought was the ground =S Wah.

Oh, and they had these weird gunnysack things hanging from the ceilings that I only noticed after I finished eating, and it was so tempting to just stand up and squeeze the gunnysacks to see what was in it. Paper? Cotton wool? Or perhaps their rubbish? Hm. It'll have to remain a mystery until I get the chance to kidnap one or something.

Skye and 'man: The fog has cleared, like finally!! Skye, thanks for listening to me =) I get what you mean, and it's processed now (not that you'll see this), and 'man? I'm glad you're back =D

Rationality: Okay, I don't know whether or not I hate my sense of rationality. Sure, there are times when it's just thrown out the window. But if I try hard enough, it comes back in about 2 days or so -_-" It's supposed to be good right? But I can't help feeling somewhat... I dunno, regretful about it all. Cause once it takes control... I don't know, sometimes it feels more like the 'shunning' part of me returns. Everything turns numb. And I don't exactly enjoy being numb.


Signing off... ...

Sunday 11 June 2006

Rose and air-con

Random post.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
The air-con switches itself on,
And I feel the cold air rush in,
Its icy-cold wings spreading themselves around me.

The switch is un-locatable,
And my limbs s l o w l y
Start to freeze.

"Are you alright?"
I hear a voice-
And yet the damned smile spreads and I nod.

No one notices,
Or even feels the cold,
And yet
I continue to freeze,
The ice-cold seeping into my bones.

I hope fervently
for the warmth they feel to spread
to my numbing limbs,
though I know it futile.

As the machine runs on,
Past efforts to recover
Slip past my conscience.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rose: Heheh... someone showed me this link to a video and a guide on how to create paper roses... If any of you guys are interested, the link's http://www.wikihow.com/Fold-a-Paper-Rose and http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BZnhMl85dq4. After I created it I took some photos and looked at them... One particular photo reminded me of the love rhombus for some odd reason... So I just took the photo and splashed one line on ^^;; Yepz, here it is, for the love rhombus (though probably only 1 of you guys will see it here):




Missing you guys.
Signing off... ...

Roller Coaster and Computron

Let me first warn you this: I'm not in the right train of mind, utter random nonsense up ahead so... read on at your own risk!

------------------------------------------------

Up and up and up... and
Whoooooosssh down with a sharp right turn.

Up and down, up and down,
another few more unexpected turns and
a 360-degree flip.

Exhiliration mixes with increasing nausea
As the ride goes on,
and yet
I refuse to get off it.

------------------------------------------------

???: Okay, err... I'm not very sure what I just wrote myself. Does it make sense?

Craziness: I'm crazy. I'm on my way to madness, I'm sure of that. "I've gotta be outta my mind" - that's the line that has been repeating itself over and over and over in my head everyday, every hour. I've never heard something repeat itself so many times before. Gah. Maybe I _am_ going crazy.

Tired: Okay, perhaps all this madness is coming from my lack of sleep, I have no idea. I've been sleeping at 3 for the past 3 days or so (okay, I know some of you do too, but I have never done that >_<) and everyone knows what happens when I get tired. I do stupid stuff. Or I get a migraine. This time, it's both. But someone has been accompanying me (virtually) the past few days and it's helped a lot in keeping me awake... So I guess it ain't that bad. ^^;;

Computron: Yep, that's the name of the competition I went for today, and will be going for again next week. The 1st round(which was today) had us creating little bots that will transfer codes to the opponent's bots when we bang into them. The aim is to eliminate them.

It was really funny cause my team's bots kept killing themselves and well. Keep getting deactivated and all for no reason. And when we tested it against the sample one in the computer, we got wiped out in a matter of a few seconds. Ah well. Thankfully, we managed to (or seem to have) improve it a little in the last 5 to 10 minutes when one of my team members suddenly suggested something. Other than the fact that the later version had my main bot turning around in circles like some mad magnetic compass I guess it worked better than the previous one ^^;;

But it was fun. =^^=

SP-dominated: Oh, and did I mention? Like 7 groups were from SP... When my group came into the room to get seated we were like the 5th SP group... The guy was like "Huh?? SP again?" and the secondary school/JC team behind us went "wah lao eh". I couldn't stop myself from laughing. Indeed, when I looked around, the entire back half of the computer lab was from our school, our faculty. Heh. Now _that_ is domination.


Signing off... ...
(????????)
I'm happy.

Thursday 8 June 2006

Guitar strings and overdose

Too much of a good thing: This is just like having an overdose - like eating the same favourite food of yours every day, for every meal. I know this is not good, and yet I'm doing it. I can foresee the time when I will be sick of it for a short period of time before it comes back again, and I don't want it to happen. Guess I'll just have to monitor my intake... Or hope it's like chicken rice. At least I won't get sick of _that_.

And in case you haven't realised... I wasn't talking about food.

The indestructable balance...: Okay, I've just found someone who noticed it too! But that person uses some other words to describe it. Used to have it in my MSN nick like for the whole of last year or something? I can't remember... But recently, it hasn't been making itself known to me, and that is... scary. Extremely so. Or maybe my happy things are just cancelling the unhappy ones? I have no idea.

CAMERA: YES YES YES!!! I've got a camera now!!! As in, again! No, my dead one hasn't revived itself, but it's as-good-as, or even better!!! Love my new cam, and I just can't WAIT to use it this Friday and Monday and whenever else.... *rubs hands in glee* This is going to be so much fun.

Randomness: Okay, I just saw something in Skye's blog that I couldn't help laughing at... Heheh... "Apparently you dun pluck a guitar string...you stroke it....XD sounds bad doesn't it". *laughs* I guess I do learn something new everyday. I never knew that despite listening to a brother play one for god-knows-how-many-years. Ah well.


Signing off... ...

Tuesday 6 June 2006

Outing with clarence and me, lucky.

Today: Yepz, went out today to watch 'Over the hedge' with Clarence (the senior). We got backed out on by 3 people... Then kept bumping into people we didn't want to bump into everywhere... -_-" Gosh. What luck. Anywayz, that was the only slightly frustrating thing today, oh, and of course, the fact that I was late. Like crap. I was L-A-T-E. =S And _everytime_ I go to the arcade I end up borrowing money from someone. Today was no exception. >_<

Yepz, but that was all the frustrating things. Other than that, I had loadsa fun. Learnt about places I've never been to, made a rather loud (and led to embarrassing) comment in the cinema, climbed the seats in the cinema, and walked through a whole afternoon of 'I'm not stupid' lines that Clarence was imitating ^^;; It was extremely fun and amusing. And of course, I just had to keep walking the wrong direction and making a fool of myself ^^;; And kicking chairs and people. Heheh...

Dance: Yippee! Danced the DDR thingy today--- It was loads of fun~ =D=D It's just wonderful being able to play with my friends-- And like my dance partner was good!!! Made me remember lotsa stuff... Realised that I seem to end up playing Para and the DDR with my good friends-- Well, at least I hope this trend continues. Wish I could take a step back and video it sometimes so that the memories will always be fresh. But I can't exactly clone myself and take the video when I'm up there dancing too, right? Ah well. Tough luck.

To sum it up: It was much better than I thought it'd be ^_^ Which is good. The only pity? I didn't bring my camera-- Or I could have taken so many cute and interesting shots ;) Heheh... Ah well. And the total number of arcades visited today: 3. =D

I'm lucky: Gosh, yes, I feel like I'm so darn lucky. No matter what turbulances I have out there, I always have some kinda anchor there... Someone to turn to, people who will reach out for me when they notice, and notice they will when they look at me. Complicated feelings rage when I'm out there, yet I always have someone who will laugh at my sceptism, look way too far ahead and way too off-track and amuse me, someone I can be there for when they are down. This, I have, and this, I'm thankful for.

And gosh, that just sounded like some kinda Prudential advertisement, didn't it? Sigh, ah well. (And somehow I know someone's gonna repeat my 'sigh' >_< Bad habit of mine, ain't it?)


Signing off... ...
(Rambling on)