Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Friends. Show all posts

Sunday, 15 February 2009

Happy early 21st Birthday, Dear Friend

I have an important friend (whom I've not contacted in a while) who's going to celebrate her 21st birthday sometime this month... And I really want to be there.

Problem is, I don't think I'm 'there' in her heart any longer and I feel awkward if I suddenly tell her "Hey I want to go to that birthday celebration that I'm not even sure I'm invited to go for".

I finally logged in to livejournal to read up on her latest entries... And it hurt, for some reason, to know that my existence is no longer... Well. That I don't seem to cross her mind any longer. Probably my fault though, to have let us drift apart so much.

Ah well.


Signing off... ...

Saturday, 24 November 2007

Cosplay, Work and Competence

Competence: Some people judge me cause of my grades, my results... Think I'm good... Truthfully, I don't think I am. People look at my results, make assumptions, carve their own impression of me... Without knowing me. Without taking the effort to know me.

I hate that.

I hate it when people say stuff like: "Aiyah, what cannot... You JLPT 1 leh!"

To hell with JLPT 1.

I took it, what, 2 years ago? Passed it on the DOT too. I was facing the principal of the Hiroshima Institute of Technology Polytechnic the other day, and I couldn't say a word. All I could do was smile and nod. Even when I wanted to say something I found that I didn't know how to.

I have no confidence, I have no ability.

Now, please stop with all these assumptions made from looking at my grades. It isn't just for Japanese, it's for everything. IT, school, friendships, dancing... Whatever.

Don't judge me from paper, from what you don't know.

Save your judgements for after you know me.

Please.

Class Outing: We had this outing a few days back, to gather with our friends whom were all flying to China for their overseas internship. We had a load of fun at Clarke Quay, and it was really great spending time with all of them =D We even took some photos~

For quite a few of them, I know that it was a long-awaited break from all the hassle and stress that came about from our schoolwork and projects. For me, it was a break alright, and an eye-opener.

Got to walk around Clarke Quay at night (which I've not exactly done before) and I got to walk past the street where all the clubs and pubs were... Twas interesting ^^ Clarke Quay in the morning and at night are seriously 2 extremely extremely different places.. (I should know. I used to frequent Clarke Quay a LOT in the morning)

Thank you to Eunice and Michelle for accompanying me to Spotlight before meeting up with the guys(the queue in Spotlight and looking at the stalls at PS caused us to be late though... Sorry..!!). It was nice to hang out with you guys, even if it was just a while ^_^

Cosplay Performance: Ok, I just came back from a 4 hour session with the cosplayers... I'm a backup dancer for the Hare Hare Yukai dance, and I seriously just CAN'T get it right. Maybe I've taken a break from dance for too long. My memory span is like what, 10 seconds now? @_@ ARGH! I've been practicing for the past 20min or so in front of my computer and I STILL can't keep up. And the dance segment's like only 30 seconds or something..! Oh noooooo.... I'll make myself practice and listen on the way to school and back or something.

Load of things to do: I have a TRUCKLOAD of things to do at the moment... When I met up with the cosplayers, I really saw how stressed the lot of them were, rushing not only theirs, but everyone else's costume, armour, accessories and what-nots. Dusty almost broke down, Skye was majorly stressed, Cat brought the crosses she had to do and was constantly working on it everytime we took a break, Mark was skipping work, and everyone was doing something or another, or helping someone else with something. Everyone was having a lack of sleep, everyone was going to sacrifice their sleeping time to complete what they can for the team.

Me? I've got school. At that moment it seemed a very weak excuse as to why I could not settle, at the very least, my own costume. I'm going to have to do this, one way or another.

It's just a LOAD of things these few weeks... Next Saturday is the event (in which I need to collect the costume, attach my armour, get my wig done, sew my skirt and attach the lace and get the dance right), and then Clar's graduating from his BMT on Tuesday... And so I'll probably have to find some time to spend with him. Adding to that is this dance performance I REALLY want to see on Wednesday.

And that shitload of things up there probably means that I will be squeezing any possible tiny bit of time for my FYP, and seriously, even _that_ is really screwing up big time too.

I just need to survive till the middle of January. Get all this settled. Get all this done. Properly. Nicely. Well.

Wish me luck. I need to learn to cope with less sleep. I have to. I need to.

Cosplay: Seeing the team and how everyone worked together, I'm reminded of why I've been staying in Cosplay all these years... I see now, why Andrea loves the team so much. 1/2 of them probably don't even know who I am, but I really starting to feel this fondness for them...

Am I still going to retire..? I have no idea. But then again, I'd likely have no cash to support my costume for next year... Guess I'll have to take it as it comes. I'll decide again when the time comes.


Signing off... ...
Busy

Thursday, 22 March 2007

Surprise farewell party

Just a quick update about today...

Farewell party: We had a 'surprise' farewell party for Momo today... And well. Andrea, as usual, kinda got Momo suspicious (so I guess). The first thing she said was "I think forget about the barbeque la, let's just take something away instead." I promptly walked over and pinched her subtly. Then... "Is Peiyi (someone whom was supposedly not in the gang that we were supposed to be hanging out with) coming today?" I pinched her again. -_-" Oh gosh! So typical!! I ended up having to pull her aside and telling her not to breathe a peep about it anymore >_< But well... It went okay after that =D It was really really fun hanging around everyone and catching up. Ended up reaching home at 12+. Like =O

Momo leaving: Momo'll be leaving Friday morning (none of us realised it was so fast!!) and most of us are planning to send her off >_<>_<>_<

My EOY cosplay: Heh, we were kinda talking about cosplay at the gathering... Just 3 of us... This is how our conversation went:

Girl 2: *ramble about our end of year cosplay plans*
Girl 1: "Trinity Blood?"
Girl 2: "Yeah. She's (me) our kate scott!"
Girl 1: "Wha? You're who?"
Me: "The hologram."
Girl 1: "Ohh!! That!"

^^;;; Hmm... I guess my character's known all round as 'the hologram' >_< Quite funny, actually, though quite sad- ^^;;


Signing off... ...

Sunday, 4 February 2007

Sighs and Re-contacting

Scary: This is terrible. The retorts and bursts that erupt in my head recently have been getting worse. It's just extremely scary to hear the kind of things I'm capable of saying when I'm scolding someone... In my head, at least... Hopefully my control is good enough to prevent it from coming out.

It's always just been emotions that indicate how I feel... and now words are starting to form... And I found that I _am_ capable of taking something from the past that was done to me and throwing it back at the person should there ever be a need to.

Sigh.

Scary.


Caged: Been feeling like that for some time now... -_-" Absolutely terrible. I found that everytime I want to say something, it'll go through my mind, and then I won't say it anymore even though it is what I feel. Even here, when it's my blog. My blog. -_-" Ah well. There are good things to it beside the bad ones that come with that, so... *shrugs*

Getting back in touch: This is absolutely amazing... I started sending forwarded messages to all sorts of friends recently when I found some in my phone when clearing my inbox... And the best thing is... Everyone got back to me in some way or another..! =D Even if it's not through sms, it may be through email, or tags or a call or something.

Love all of you guys. ^^ Helped me LOADS in lifting my spirits up when I needed it most. I am so glad I have you guys as friends ;)

Thanks a million..!



Signing off... ...