So tired... ...

I'm so sorry, whoever it is that's reading this... I haven't updated in ages... Haven't had the time... and am so extremely tired when I come back from school... I can't remember stuff that I wanted to blog about, so I shall just talk about things that are super recent -- like today.

Computing: Gosh, some certain people in my CT are irritating me... And I feel damn guilty during computing... A few people like to copy my programmes and just paste them as their own, without knowing how to do it!!! I mean, what's the point of doing computing then??? You might as well not come for the practical!! And if you don't know, there's always someone called the TEACHER that you can get help from!!! They keep bugging me to let them copy, but I feel that I'm not helping them at all. Friends? Hmf. I hardly feel like it. I feel like I'm only helping them to become worse in computing... I don't mind if they just look at how others do it and learn, but they're just copying wholesale!!! Fine, not all of the time, but still quite often. Some of the guys that _used_ to copy are doing everything on their own now. They even went to borrow books on computing. Like wow.

I know I'm ranting... sorry. Slightly pissed. You don't ask someone for help, piss her off at the same time, and then decide to copy her work. I'm not mentioning names. And the teacher had the idea that the guy was so smart to handle it on his own and thought that I had much difficulty handling mine. He even asked me "Can you cope? If you need any help you can ask me. " Like WHAT??? Argh. Thank you so much for your faith in me.

Fine. So I'm over-sensitive. But seriously, you shouldn't me telling me this when I'm trying my best to do everything on my own. And to think that usually my friends are sensible enough to try everything on their own. Obviously now it isn't the case... They don't realise I'm trying to help them grasp the subject better... Copying won't help. Trust me. I've been there.

O level results coming out: Whee. Another problem. Results are out in like, what? 3 days? And I am still unsure about where to go. Poly? JC? My friends will know how bloody lazy I am. Either route I will have to change myself and be more disciplined. Poly expects a lot from me, and I have a low self-esteem. How the heck can I handle myself in poly? Poly will probably demand more and train me more, while in JC there are opportunities for such training, though optional. Knowing myself, I'll probably need to go to poly.

Then come the next few problems... course and choice of poly. Merlin knows that I didn't get to go to ANY of the open houses. I. Am. So. Screwed. I'm thinking of either Singpapore Poly or Nanyang Poly, depending on the course I finally decide on. Animation I'm scared of entering, so on the safe side I better not... Interactive media design sounds like what I did in MMC in Secondary school, but I'm not sure. It sure sounds fun. And then there's Computer Science. Hmm. Follow my brother's footsteps? I don't know... Will I be able to handle it? If I go step by step I should be okay... right? Right? *sigh* I'm so damn dead.

I so badly need someone neutral to talk to me... Someone who won't keep pressurizing me to go to JC without even listening to me... 3 days... omg. I repeat -- I. Am. So. Screwed. Help.


Signing off... ...